Friday, June 19, 2009


As action-figures around the world are suspiciously gaining muscle and losing body fat, THE OUTER MEN vow to "stay clean." A recent scientific study compared the physique of GI Joe action-figures from the 1960's and today. If the Joes from the 60's were 5 feet 10 inches tall, they would have a chest measuring 44 inches and biceps measuring 12 inches. Not too shabby! By comparison, a contemporary Joe would have measurements of 55 and 15 inches respectively. And at the same time a noticeable loss of body fat has occurred. Really?!
What affect might this type of unattainable appearance have on our youth? Adolescence in America is filled with enough angst already. Throw some body image issues on top and we have a psychological powder-keg on our hands. At a time when our sports stars are being exposed as steroid-using cheats. Must our super-heroes be dirty?
True to their time and place in history, THE OUTER SPACE MEN appeared fit. Not ridiculously muscle bound, chiseled and veiny. Expect more of the same when they make their eventual return to action-figure immortality! Saving Earth from those who might wish it harm keep them pretty trim. Besides which, the code of the Inter-planetary Security Council strictly forbids the use of Performance Enhancing Drugs.


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